Michelle Mardos - A Caregiver's Story

Michelle Mardos was working long hours as a public accountant in 2005 when a friend mentioned an acquaintance who might need accounting help. The potential client was Willie Mardos, an Air Force veteran injured nearly two decades earlier in a snow-clearing accident, resulting in incomplete quadriplegia.

However, it wasn’t really about doing the books.

“I think it was more of a setup for us to meet,” Michelle Mardos said. The bottom line for the accountant and soldier? The couple married in 2009.

“My husband has a great personality—it’s almost magnetic. You’re just drawn to him when you meet him,” Michelle said. “I never really looked at his injury as being an issue.”

Willie Mardos was 20 years old, stationed in Colorado when he was injured in 1984. He and a friend volunteered to shovel snow and then climbed a wooden fence. The fence gave way and Willie fell, snapping his neck.

Before they met, Willie relied on a private nursing agency. The first six months while dating, Michelle said, Willie “really kept a lot of his nursing issues private and out of our relationship. I really didn’t know how much was involved or what was involved.”

But over time, with the agency having staffing issues and a lot of turnover, Willie opened up about the challenges, and the couple decided Michelle would be his primary caregiver.

Today she helps her husband in and out of bed and with bathing, dressing and meal preparation. Willie has some upper body movement so he can feed himself. Although he has a driver’s license, he prefers that Michelle navigate the curvy mountain roads near their rural home in West Virginia.

Michelle still works part-time as an accountant, mostly from home but sometimes evenings in the office. “It gives us some time apart, which is important when you’re giving someone care 24 hours a day and 7 days a week,” she said.

An artist since high school, Willie recently began painting. The couple added an art studio to their home. The private retreat is accessible through a breezeway and includes a drawing table and supplies.

“It’s like a little ‘man cave’—his getaway,” Michelle said. “Once I get him set up with his pens and his paint, he’s in his own world and I’m kind of free to relax.”
 
Because of his injury, Willie cannot move his fingers; to paint, he uses rubber grips around a pencil or brush to create a resting place between his thumb and fingers for his creative tools. He enters numerous competitions, including the National Veterans Creative Arts Festival, where he has competed twice and received blue ribbons both times.

“I share my recent gold medals [from the 31st National Veterans Wheelchair Games] and blue ribbons with my wife,” he said. “They're a reflection of her encouragement, support and love.”

“I don’t want people to think what I do is a job,” Michelle said. “What I do is just natural for me. It’s part of who he and I are.”

Pamela Babcock is a writer, editor and communications consultant.